Thursday, January 28, 2010

Maybe It's Raining In Tucson?

Drop Mike off the airport at 5 am and by the time I'm back home I'm welcomed by more snow. He's on his way to the desert sun and I'm busting my ass (literally).

This is NOT a good idea


Yes, that is the imprint of my body


Someone enjoys watching me shovel!!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Near Miss



ac·ci·dent-prone (ks-dnt-prn)
adj.
Having or susceptible to having a greater than average number of accidents or mishaps.


Yes, that's me...let's just recap my last few years shall we?

2007 Broke the ball off my humerus.Two months of my arm in a sling. Went on to break my hand
2008 3 Herniated discs.OUCH. Still enjoying the aftermath of that
2009 Endocarditis, Erlichia, etc. It was a BAD year!!
2010 ?????

Okay, so the heart thing wasn't an accident. It was my damn auto immune system. Still it hasn't been a pretty last few years. I haven't had one full year where I've been without injury and/or illness. I'll take the everyday "illness" that I have to deal with. That's not really a choice. It's the secondary illnesses or accidents that I need to be a little more careful about.

So this past Thursday I got lucky. Mike and I thought for sure I had a broken foot. The truck ran me over in our driveway. Yes, you read that correctly.Truck. Own driveway. Ran me over.

To make a long story short I was warming up the truck and went to get in and the emergency brake gave way. I tried to put my foot on the brake (not a good idea as the truck is moving backwards), I fell out on my tail bone, the door knocked me over, dragged me down he driveway, truck ran over my right foot. Laughing, yet? I was stunned and laying in the driveway. I watched as the truck careened down the driveway towards the car, missed it, and hit a tree. I was worried about the truck. Then all I could really think about is that the day before work gave me a new PDA and I could see it laying a few feet away in the snow. Seriously, I should be a product tester. You should see what I can do to a laptop.

Once the initial shock had subsided I was pissed. I cannot be hurt again!!

I haven't been without illness or injury for an entire year in quite some time. This is my mission this year. I'm always going to have to deal with whatever my body throws me on the auto-immune front. However, I'm REALLY making an effort to not have anymore dumbass mishaps this year. I'm going to make an effort to listen to my body, wear bug spray (damn ticks), and stay away from infectious sick people.

So stay away form me if you're coughing, snotting, or feverish. Seriously. I don't need the H1N1 added to my list. I've never really been a germaphobe in that respect. Put me on immunosuppressants and I become a maniac. Seriously. I will spray you with Lysol and Purell you down people. Don't take it personally. I'm really trying to make it through 2010 HEALTHY. Game on. DEFCON 1.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Santa Hit and Run

So it seems fitting that this would have happened to me. We just moved. I don't want to be the neighborhood freaks already. That day will come. I just was hoping it could wait until spring. The keeping a low profile thing ended last week when I was on my way into the office and I went around a blind corner and there it was--a blow up Santa. I ran it over. It was Santa or the Subaru Outback in the left lane. I chose Santa. I dragged the monstrosity about 25 yards or so before I could pull over. It was in my grill like a plastic bag! The guy behind me pulled over. He shook his head and said: "There's something you don't see every day". Do I leave a note? Call the cops? What's the protocol here? People were driving by staring at the spectacle. I was kind of in shock then I began laughing HYSTERICALLY. I dragged it back to the site of impact and put it in the closest yard. That was a special moment in a suit and heels. It looked like someone was trying to throw it away because it had been detached from the motor. Santa had other plans...

If you know me you know that I have a deep seeded hatred of all things yard art. Especially, the holiday blow-ups. I called my assistant on the way in and told her about the unfortunate event. She was laughing so hard she had to hang up the phone. She kept saying that only I could get attacked by yard art!! My hatred has finally come back to bite me. Now lawn ornaments are attacking me!! It's true.

I walk into the office and it is quiet. Too quiet. I look around and these lovely posters had been made and posted everywhere (sorry for the quality):


I will say I have a new respect for yard art.