Chain Whip of Death

I've had a little cold/sinus thing working for a week so I took some cold medicine before bed last night. I don't react well to OTC drugs such as these. I've been known to scream in my sleep and wake up whinnying like a horse when under the effects of these seemingly innocuous OTC drugs. I've experienced robo-tripping by accident way before it was a thing. Talk about a bizarro dream. I dreamt that I fought off a nighttime intruder with a chain whip. A chain whip. Not a baseball bat or a golf club. A chain whip.

I heard an intruder at the front door. I grabbed my trusty chain whip from beside the bed and waited for him to cross the threshold of the bedroom. He did and I attacked him with a chain whip and he fled outside where he collapsed from the chain whip beating injuries. The cops came, arrested the intruder and took my statement. They kept telling me that I was so lucky I had my trusty chain whip and it's a good idea that everyone keep a chain whip beside their bed. The world would be a safer place.

I was still out of it in this morning and I actually woke up and looked to make sure there was no chain whip beside my bed and that there was no sign of an intruder in the house or yard.

Maybe I will put the chain whip beside the bed. I do have cogs, a derailleur hanger, extra drop-outs and brake pads in my underwear drawer. I really don't know when all those things made their way into the bedroom. (Please note: we have a basement and a shed for all things bikes so I have no answer as to why.  It just is.) I think a chain whip beside the bed would be the next logical step.